Empathy

What is empathy?

"To put yourself in someone else's shoes."

"To see and feel things from the perspective of someone else."

"To understand an opinion other than your own."

These are a few good answers that students have given when asked what empathy is.  Yet beyond just understanding the definition, it is different and more challenging to actually model empathy, for adults and children alike.  We adults think we have good perspective.  We think we understand each other and situations and approach them fairly.  But do we really?  Do we really approach every new person and situation without bias or baggage or preconceptions?  We certainly like to hope and think so.  But it's sometimes harder than it sounds, as humans are complicated.  On the flip side, it is in our nature to care what others think of us, and to want to be judged fairly, without bias and misconception, and to be understood with empathy.

As a school that embraces and celebrates the diversity and individuality of each of our students (and adults!), we still need to work at helping students of middle school age to be empathetic.  Some are born with overflowing empathy.  For others it doesn't come as naturally.  All children are "rigged" to treat each other with kindness.  This is evident in elementary schools, where students are always so helpful and caring to each other.  Yet as hormones kick in, social situations get more challenging, and boundaries are tested, empathy can sometimes take a back seat in the teenage brain.  It is therefore so critical, as our pre-teens and teens develop and move through this challenging time of their lives, that we give them many opportunities to learn about and to practice empathy and perspective taking.   The venues at Coolidge in which we address topics of empathy, bias, perspective, and diversity include: Advisory groups; 7th grade Health class; 8th grade Choices class (tied in with Wellness); Social Studies and ELA; and A World of Difference.  There are additional opportunities that come up naturally, spurred on by current events.

Parents and teachers (and students, of course) have the power to model empathy and to encourage students to remove bias and judgement when they meet new people and are in new situations.  Students hear what we say, watch how we respond, and copy what they see modeled.  Are we being our best selves to model the empathy that we expect in our own students, both with other adults and with children?

Many staff will be sharing the following (short) video clip with students and will be discussing it.  It focuses on a middle school football team modeling empathy for a fellow player.  I was quite moved, and hope you enjoy it!

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=50157962n